Why do I have to work with these amateurs?
It has come to my attention that the vast majority of people trying to get into the music industry are complete gimps. Like all the rest of them, I believe that I have something which people should hear. I believe I have a talent and I believe I can touch people with the noises I produce. Etc.
Thing is, every week I meet people who believe exactly the same things about themselves, and in nearly every case, you can tell within a minute that they don't really stand a chance.
Then again, the Stereophonics have had a successful career.
Hmm, well, perhaps you can tell that I spent my afternoon trying to work with yet another singer whose actual knowledge of music or rhythm was precisely nil. Like trying to make a jam sandwich without bread, it's difficult, messy, has no solid base, and tends to go all over the place.
Thing is, this reflects life generally. The vast majority of all people are complete gimps. The vast majority of people who will be voting on 1. the EU constitution and 2. the UK general election will neither have read the details of the constitution nor the policy details of each party. And you can hardly blame them for not reading up on such interminably dull information. But, you know.
To summarise: you should only be allowed to vote if you can show you fully understand what you're voting for. You should have to pass a set of thorough practical, theoretical, physical and mental examinations before being allowed to bring up children. And you should bring bread if you want to make jam sandwiches with me. But the greatest commandment is to bring bread for the jam sandwiches.
posted by Timber @ 8:03 pm
3 comments
3 Comments:
During my Italian A-Level, we had to write a 500 word mock exam piece about our future dreams for family life. I proposed a slightly more unrealistic idea for essentially the same thing you proposed - a procreation licence.
I basically suggested that every new boy baby born was given some kind of sperm killing/blocking/whatever thing inside them at birth, and at any point after the age of 25, they could take an exam to see if they passed the fit to procreate test. If they passed, then they'd invatrably choose the best mothers possible to undertake the right they earned to create new people, hence leaving all children wonderful, perfect, and brilliant. If they failed, they couldn't try again for two years.
(I may also have added something in about refusing medical treatment to anyone who tried to remove their own contraceptive device.)
Anyway, though my mark for the piece was ok, the comments underneath weren't entirely in agreement. Ha scritto un gran gran commente, e stava parlando di Benito Mussolini e comè quest'idea lui sarebbe stato piacuto. (I always hated that ambiguity about piacere in Italian, and not having actively used it for months means that I have most likely bodged that sentence up completely.)
So, taking my teachers' advice - Tim, you're an extreme right wing Italian dead dictator.
(Note: for those worrying, I wasn't being entirely serious in the Italian exam. I'd rather children be banned altogether…)
Wow, Mike, and you said you were a Liberal Democrat ? State sterilistation (admittitedly temporary) sounds just ever-so-slightly right-wing to me. Anyhoo, I do feel that people should be limited by their income to a certain number of kids - ie 20,000 or less p/a = 2 kids. Spongy bastards with 8 kids, no job, and about 4 council houses knocked together really get my goat, esp when the kids have tasteless names (such as Zebra, the name a girl in the first year at BIP gave to her poor unfortunate) That's all really
Luke, I was being deliberately controversial and provocative. It wasn't a serious suggestion.
Gimp.
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